tips on handling her

So let’s say you’ve got her in your arms–yada, yada–now. But I’ve got to say it’s just half of the road. Once you’ve got her, you still have to think hard to keep her to you. You’ve got to guarantee her stay in your arms once she’s there.

Fine, I’m not the best person to give tips on this but I guess I have a couple of tricks in my sleeve in how to keep her on me. To all my close friends who have a hint or two about my love life, I guess they have a picture of how I handle my girl. I’m really proud to say that we’ve been going out for quite some time now. About three years.

Of course, we’ve got our ups and downs. A lot of downs, really. But by the end of the day, she’s still with me and I’m quite thankful of this. Well, out of this gratitude, I decided to pay forward by sharing some of the many things I’ve been considering in keeping her. They may not be the best tips but I guess they’ve done me some good. I suppose it’s worth reading:

1. Stay Sweet. Very sweet. I guess girls have this tendency of remembering your “sweetness level”. Whenever it comes up! They swell with joy. But whenever it comes down, they panic. I guess this is where the small fights happen. They are really sensitive, these girls. So try matching up with their sensitivity and stay sweet!

2. Buy Her Things. If you can afford, try buying her cute things and stuff. If you can’t, still, try buying her cute things and stuff. Believe me when I say, she deserves the best! I’ve done some crazy budgeting once in a while for my girlfriend. I actually skipped meals just to buy her something. And you know what? Whenever I see her happy and appreciative about it, I can say that it’s worth every cent!

3. Notice The Small Details. It’s another case of sensitivity. The way she wears her hair, her clean hands, her new outfit, her stylish hairdo! Even her new little earrings! Surprise her with the fact that you actually care about how she looks and smells! Of course, you’ve got to be cool in surprising her. Don’t give her the impression of you being an obnoxious prick who notices her in every detail. Just keep it simple and cool.

4. Admire Her Smile. For me, her smile is the best cure to every depressing spell. It’s the one that brightens your days and silences your nights. It’s your sun, moon and stars. Seriously. If you don’t feel like this about her smile, then I can say there’s something odd about that.

5. Write Her Notes. Girls usually like it. Especially when she gets to keep the little love notes. Text messages are also good, but it’s better if you make it stick or in other words, make it memorable! On my experience, the cornier the better. The cheesier the worse. There’s a difference between corny and cheesy. On my dictionary, corny means cute and cheesy means annoying. I’m not really sure about that but that’s how I figure it out.

6. Greet Her At Least Twice A Day. Yup! One in the morning and one in the evening. But it’s better if you greet her more. Make her feel that you’re there and that you care. Don’t be annoying. Be cute, though.

7. Nod On The Right Times. Like I said, make her feel that you’re there. Listen to her and tell her that you do listen to her. Girls usually likes to talk and share stories. If you want to keep her, then you better start to be a good listener. Of course, you should also show that you’ve got some sensual feedbacks for her.

8. Keep Her In A Good Mood. Like my good cousin DaveNorth always say, “Keep her happy!” There is of course a simple logic to it. “Keep her happy to keep her!” It’s that simple, really. Of course, you can’t expect her to stay being in a good mood all the time. But, of course, being the caring and supporting partner, you’ve got to let her know that you’re always there no matter what. In good or bad times, you’re ready to accept her.

9. Steal A Kiss Or Two. It’s self-explanatory. You’ll both like it. I promise.

10. Remind Her. Remind her of the first time she said “yes”. Remind her of the first kiss you gave her. Remind her the first time she cried and how you made her feel okay. Remind her that you’ll always be there no matter how fat and ugly she could be within the next three years. Remind her of the promise you gave of how you’ll take care of her and protect her from every one who dares to offend her. Most importantly, remind her…

you love her.

when with her

Here are some of the ways on how I behave whenever I’m with crushes. No, I’m not courting them. I wouldn’t want to. I simply want to settle in the getting-to-know stage. It works, sometimes.

1. Send her message after message. Through email or through text, it doesn’t matter. Make use of the darn technology we have today. But then you could always use the old fashion style like sending it through a cute kid or leaving it on her desk or something.

2. Stalk her. I mean it. Study her every move. You must know the essential things about her and the things that only few people know. Be prepared. You must know what color she likes. What attitudes she abhors and the way she ties her shoelace. Do not court her unless you know the name of her parent’s only child that is not her sibling.

3. When you’re with her, always talk about her. Her, her, her. The spotlight is always on her. She’s the star! Whenever she changes the topic to you, divert the topic back to her. Notice the every little things she does. Compliment her hair, her look, her voice. Flatter her. Flatter with style. Do not be obvious when lying.

4. Do not crowd her. She wouldn’t like it. Don’t send her 214 text messages a day! Do not go and chase her. Don’t be there always. When you’re in a photo exhibit, do not watch at the same picture she’s looking at. Catch her eye when she’s a distance away, don’t look at her when she’s near.

5. Listen. Let her talk a lot. Don’t interrupt her. Nod on the right times. Give good opinions. Let her know you’re listening. Make her feel that you’re interested on everything she says. 

6. Surprise her. Everything must be new! Or rather make it in such a way that old things seem new to her. Surprise her everyday!

no jolens for me

“Kung saan ka magaling at kung saan ka masaya.”

My desire for writing has started immediately after I realized that I could write, which is when I was really really young. I was about four or five maybe when I kept on writing and writing anything I could think of. My parents didn’t have anything against that, on the contrary, they encouraged me. What drove them crazy is the fact that I wanted to write anything anywhere! Vandalism was like one of the first few long words I really understood.

Still I realized that drawing was easier than writing. My tiny little hands that time was more used to drawing circles and somewhat obscure impressions of Batman. I wanted to be one of the guys who made comics. My mom also encouraged me there but I’m still confused why she never bought me a single comic book.

On my elementary years, I developed a knack in reading. It became a religious hobby for me. I preferred those books with illustrations of course, but when I started reading those little paperback books like R. L. Stine’s Goosebumps and those kinds of books with the front cover as the only illustration, I accepted the fact that I could actually paint my own illustrations thanks to the writer’s effort. If you’re wondering why I didn’t play basketball or tigso or jolens or any other games kid’s that age should be playing is because of the fact that I was a very loser-ish kind of kid when it comes to those games. I don’t mind getting tired, really. It’s the fact of losing and being teased about it that gets me.

In my high school years I accidentally stumbled to the greek mythology craze. I really don’t know why on those adolescent years, people seem to be very fascinated with them. I was quite a fan. Along with that my mother began to buy me anthologies of famous writers from Victoria Plaza’s book sales. I have actually read about Pip on Charles Dickens’ Great Expectations and Ebenezer Scrooge in his A Christmas Carol. I’ve read about Rip Van Winkle, and boy! do I like his story. I’ve read Lewis Caroll’s Alice in Wonderland and was very amazed on how his nonsense was very intelligent. But I didn’t understand the text that much at that time. I was familiar with the terms though.

In high school I wrote for our school paper but I wasn’t very good at journalism. My field there was feature writing. I had my share of minor awards. I never get to go to the nationals. Still, I never gave up writing as a hobby. And since I was very much exposed in short stories that time, I was somehow driven to write my first short stories on that period.

They weren’t good. They were actually horrible. I wrote about love relationships and fantasy as it was easier to have readers with those themes. I used psychological twists at the end of my stories which I used frequently. Eventually my “readers” found me predictable and I didn’t want that so I stopped writing at that time.

My mother wanted me to take up the nursing course like any other typical mothers at that time. They wanted me to pursue that course in hope of getting a chance to get abroad. My application to UP changed that. Despite the fact that she wanted me to pursue nursing, she was still blinded by the prestige of UP’s name. She wanted me to proceed to law afterward, though.

And so I ended up here. In a writing course, of course. I never did and never will (I hope) regret taking up this course. Beccy Anonuevo once told me over durian shakes with fellow friends at Iligan that her dad told her that in making decisions or choosing preferences (like courses) in life we must always consider two things: One, which choice you’re good at and two, which choice you’re happy at.

I’m glad I made the write (pun intended) choice.